Friday, January 3, 2014

"Rocking the Life Unexpected" by Jody Day

As someone who has been blogging about life without children for six (!) years now -- and living the life for 12 (!!) -- I often get comments and questions from women whose fertility journeys have likewise ended without a baby:  How, HOW, they ask, do you "get over" the disappointment of never having children (when you really did want and hope for and plan for them), and move on with your life?  (DO you ever "get over it"?) 

Jody Day, founder of Gateway Women, a fabulous resource for women like us, not only answers "yes" in her wonderful new book, Rocking the Life Unexpected, but outlines a clearly marked route you can follow down this road less travelled.  

The book's description on Amazon calls it "a mixture of autobiography, social history and self-help... a book that blends the personal, the political and the practical to support childless-by-circumstance women to move forward with their lives."

Like the award-winning "Silent Sorority" by fellow blogger Pamela Tsigdinos of Coming2Terms and A Fresh Start, and "I'm Taking My Eggs and Going Home" by Lisa Manterfield, who has created the Life Without Baby blog and online community (both books that I love and recommend highly), Jody tells her personal story in this book -- and no doubt you will find much to relate to there. 

Beyond her personal story, though, Jody analyzes the role of childless women in our world, today and in the past -- how we got here -- and the implications for a society that seems besotted with motherhood at the same time that more and more women are remaining childless. She brings up a lot of great points that I didn't know about or hadn't considered before, and I hope that marketers, policymakers and politicians are paying attention to what she has to say.

Finally, Jody, who is working to become a psychotherapist, walks readers through the construction of a concrete plan for a satisfying life without children -- including creative exercises designed to help you to work through your grief, envision what a good life without children might look like (to you), and how you can create that life for yourself. The exercises were developed as part of the workshops Jody has developed & delivered to childless women in the U.K., and can be used in a group setting or privately, at your own pace.

This is a landmark book, and I can't recommend it highly enough. : ) While you might have difficulty finding it in your local bookstore, it's available online in both electronic and paperback formats.

(This was book #25 that I read in 2013.)

3 comments:

Brooke said...

I would love to read this book. Although I have a child now, I'm often uncomfortable with the idea that my life is defined by my motherhood--or by other people's perceptions of it. I have several friends and relatives who are childless by choice or circumstance and the truth is that they are some of the most interesting and happiest people I know. At the same time, after losing Eliza I truly felt like the only thing that could help me was having another baby, and I empathize deeply with people who struggle with infertility. The grief and frustration of life not working out as planned can be truly overwhelming. I'm putting Day's book on my 2014 list.

Jody Day said...

Hi Loribeth
Thanks so much for this wonderful review of my book! I'm so glad that the mixture of the personal, the practical and the political resonated with you too.
I just wanted to let your readers know, if it's appropriate, that I host a free private book club for readers over on G+ where readers can interact with other readers, find a reading buddy and ask the author anything they'd like to. It's only open to members of the free private GW Online Community (to keep it feeling safe and private) and you, and any of your readers would be welcome to join.
More info on the GW Online Community here: http://www.gateway-women.com/community
More info on the book club here:
http://www.gateway-women.com/book
Thanks for your support sister - it's so good to have companions on the road less travelled!
Happy New Year
Hugs,
Jody x

Jody Day said...

Hi Loribeth
Thanks so much for this wonderful review of my book! I'm so glad that the mixture of the personal, the practical and the political resonated with you too.
I just wanted to let your readers know, if it's appropriate, that I host a free private book club for readers over on G+ where readers can interact with other readers, find a reading buddy and ask the author anything they'd like to. It's only open to members of the free private GW Online Community (to keep it feeling safe and private) and you, and any of your readers would be welcome to join.
More info on the GW Online Community here: http://www.gateway-women.com/community
More info on the book club here:
http://www.gateway-women.com/book
Thanks for your support sister - it's so good to have companions on the road less travelled!
Happy New Year
Hugs,
Jody x